Summer Paradise
by moon12345
Summary: AU where Barney knew Robin before any of the others did. Robin\Barney.
1. Chapter 1

AN: I own nothing. Also, English isn't my first language, so there might be some grammar mistakes. please r&r. Enjoy!

 **Summer Paradise**

Chapter one

Tonight started out just as any other ordinary night for Barney. Well, not ordinary, as he was Barney Stinson, hence each night was a legendary night for him. But nothing unusual seemed to welcome him as he walked into Maclarance Pub to meet his friend Ted. He was still excited, though, and had this wired feeling that tonight was going to be awesome.

That was life for Barney those days. He had his awesome job where he didn't have to work too hard but still get a lot of money, his great friends Ted and Marshall (and Marshall's girlfriend, Lily, who was nice enough and supplied femininity to their little gang), his awesome big brother and his mom whom he talked to almost every day. And of course he had cigars, booze, laser tag, the strip club and bimbos. Oh, how he loves those stupid bimbos.

So, overall, you could say his life was pretty much perfect.

He sat at the bar, drinking his beer and scanning the room while waiting for Ted. It was a weak night, not so many hot chicks as he had hoped, but then a group of women entered through the door and Barney noticed one of them had a really nice body. She was tall and lean, with long brown hair. He didn't see her face, but he was sure the girl in the green sweater had to be pretty. He hoped she was Lebanese.

Just when he started to think of a way to get in those girl's pants Ted walked in.

"Ted!" he said, annoyed, "where's your suit?"

Of course he didn't suit up, as usual. Barney didn't really expect him to, but for once he wished Ted would listen to him. Just once. And Ted had the lack of awareness to think that Blazer of him was a suit. _I mean, come on_ , Barney thought, _have I taught him nothing?_

Ted started talking about the meaning of life, or some other stupid thing, and Barney really didn't want to think of such depressing things tonight. No, tonight was about having fun. So to shut Ted up and have time for his own fun, he decided to play his famous game, "Have you met Ted". And although Ted argued at first, Barney knew he would thank him later. So he tapped on the shoulder of the girl who stood by him and walked away after saying, "Hi, haaaave you met Ted?"

He tried to find the girl in the green sweater but couldn't see her anywhere. Great, now he would have to find a new target to win tonight, and he really wanted to score that girl. She looked like a ten, even if he only saw her back. But he couldn't find her, so he settled on talking to a pretty blond girl with brown coat who told him she wasn't supposed to talk to any guy tonight because her friend just got dumped, and she was waiting for her to get back from the bathroom.

"I'm sorry, you seem really nice-"

Nice? Barney Stinson was a lot of things, nice wasn't one of them.

"-but if she'll see me talk to you it would only hurt her more, and tonight is about her. Oh, here she is right now! Bye!" she waved him off and joined two women who walked out of the ladies room. Barney saw a glimpse of green walk past him as the three of them sat down at their booth. So, that girl with the green sweater had been dumped, or with a friend who got dumped, and had no intention to talk to any guys tonight. So much for his luck.

He sighed, starting to accept defeat, and walked to the bar to order himself some scotch. Ted saw him and came up to talk to him.

"So, guess what that Lebanese girl just told me?"

"No way, she was Lebanese? Damn I should have said dibs!" said Barney in frustration.

"Doesn't matter, she's Carl's Boyfriend. Agh, why am I freaking out all of the sudden? This is crazy, I'm not ready to settle down."

Barney didn't really listen to him, he was more focused on his amount of opportunities to turn this night awesome. Stupid Carl and his Lebanese girlfriend.

"The plan always been don't even think about it till you're thirty."

"Exactly, the guy doesn't even own a suit!" oh, wait, did Ted just repeated his most important rule? Maybe he was finally listening!

"Plus, Marshall already found the love of his life," _oh, not again with the true love crap_ , "even if I was ready, which I'm not, but if I was, it's like, okay, I'm ready, where is she?"

Ted turned around then, his eyes landing on the one girl Barney had the eyes for all night, the girl in the green sweater.

"Hey, Barney, see that girl?"

And for the first time that night, so were Barney's eyes. He looked at her beautiful face, her blue eyes and her pretty smile, and he knew, just at that second, that he had seen that face before. He knew that girl. He just couldn't remember from where.

"Oh, yeah," he said, trying his hardest to remember where he knew that girl from. "You just know she likes it dirty." But that wasn't it, she wasn't one of his conquests. He would have defiantly remembered sleeping with such a beautiful girl. No, he knew her from somewhere else. And suddenly it hit him, this image, this memory. In some other lifetime, in this big cold country, a big mall, a young girl with blue eyes and long blond curls. _Oh damn_ , he thought. It was her, it was Robin!

Barney panicked. This can't be happening. She shouldn't be here, in New York, in his life. He was different now, and she **knew** him, knew some of his secrets that he tried so hard to bury deep down in the past.

No one was supposed to know, and she was here, in his bar! What if she recognized him too and revealed some of his secrets to Ted? No, he couldn't let that happen. He had to get out of there, before she saw him. He had to distract Ted somehow.

"Go say hi," he told him, hiding his stress.

Of course Ted had to argue, "I can't just go say hi, I need a plan-"

But Barney didn't have time for this, because she was coming their way. _Shit, I have to get out of here!_

So as Ted continued his rambling, Barney walked up to Robin from behind and quickly tapped on her shoulder, adding his "Hey, have you met Ted?" before she could turn around and see him.

And then he ran for it.

He made his way to the restroom, locking himself in one of the stools, leaning his back on the heavy door, and that was when he let himself take out a sigh he didn't notice he was holding in.

 _Okay_ , he thought to himself. _I can do this. She is going to turn Ted down and then I won't have to see her again._

He wanted to kick himself when a single thought crept to his mind. _But what if I do want to see her again?_

 _No!_ he shouted at himself in his mind. _You do not want anything to do with that girl! She has no part in your new life, despite how beautiful she might have become! And you are Barney Stinson, you do not do beautiful, you do hot and dirty and stupid bimbos!_

But none of this mattered, because he knew she would turn down his friend and then it would all go back to normal. He took three deep breathes and walked out of the restroom, just in time to see Robin throw her drink at Ted and walking away from him. He sighed in relief and went back to where Ted was standing near the bar.

He laughed at Ted's face, trying to go back to his cocky self. "De- wait for it- nied! Denied!"

"I'm going out with her tomorrow night," Ted grinned at him.

No no no no no! this can not be happening to him! Ted can't go out with **her**!

"I thought we were playing Lased Tag tomorrow night!" he said, trying his best to sound hurt by his friend's abandonment. Maybe Ted would feel guilty and cancel his date.

"Yeah, I was never really going to play Laser Tag…" he said, crashing Barney's hopes.

"But you promised!" he tried again, not giving up. "I came here tonight for you! As my best bro and wingman, you have to come with me tomorrow!"

"Dude, come on, don't make this hard. Just look at her, she is the most gorgeous girl I have ever seen! She might be the one!"

"Ppft, the one," Barney chuckled, "how lame."

"I'm going out with her tomorrow, and that's final."

"Whatever. I'm getting out of here!"

He said angrily and left. He took a cab back to his apartment, trying hard to think of a way to prevent Ted from going out with Robin. If she became his girlfriend, he would introduce her to his friends, and she would meet Barney and recognize him and tell everyone of what a big loser he used to be.

Now, when he was alone, he could let his mind wonder back to those memories, from ten years ago, when he was eighteen.

 _He just graduated from high school, and was about to start his first year at collage. He was very exited to start a new stage in life, as his life so far wasn't as great as he wanted it to be. He wasn't an ordinary teenage guy; he had different interests from the other kids in his school. He liked doing magic and playing his violin. He usually hang out by himself at school, and didn't try to communicate with the rest of the students in his year. Mostly he felt like no one ever understood him._

 _His mom and brother were the only people he let himself be close to, and it got them worried. That was why his mother was very pleased when he got accepted to MIT, the Magicians Institute of Teaneck. Maybe now he could be around other people his age who he could share his interests with._

 _To celebrate his acceptance, his mother decided to take him on a trip the summer before collage. They decided together to go somewhere close, not too expensive, where he could see other places of the world before he started his studies. That's how they got to spend the last two weeks of August in Toronto._

 _Barney enjoyed the time he got to spend with his mom, but sometime around the day of their trip he couldn't take her company anymore and wanted to spend some time by himself._

 _"Mom, I'm going to explore the area, I'll be back in about two hours or so," he told his mother. She smiled at him kindly and handed him a few Canadian dollars._

 _"Okay Wuv Wuv, have fun and be safe!"_

 _Barney left the hotel and started walking down the street. He didn't really know where he should go, but after fifteen minutes he found himself in front of a big mall. Not having anything better to do, he decided to walk in and buy himself something to drink. There were many people in the mall, more than he expected. Most of them where teenagers, a bit younger than him. He didn't feel too comfortable around so many people, so he got himself a cold coffee from Tim Hortons and started to go towards the exit._

 _Suddenly he felt something hit him from behind, making him spill the coffee on the floor._

 _"Oh, I'm so sorry," said a feminine voice behind him, with thick Canadian accent._

 _"It's alright," he said, and turned around to look at the person who bumped into him. She seemed around his age, maybe a little bit younger. She had long blond curly hair, with a red band tied up in it. She wore a jeans jacket, and a cute little skirt. When he looked at her blue eyes he saw she had been crying. "Are you okay?" he asked, trying to be nice._

 _"Oh, yeah, of course," she said, whipping a few tears from her cheeks. "Just fine. Hey, I should buy you a new drink." She offered, pointing on the direction of the near coffee shop._

 _"No, it's alright, I was just about to get out of here," He told her. He really didn't want to be in that mall with all those people any longer. "Too crowded for me."_

 _She nodded, looking around her. "Yeah, I get what you mean. Hey, how about we get out of here and go to a quiet coffee shop where I could repay for the drink I spilled?"_

 _Barney looked at her, surprised. Had this gorgeous girl just offered to go on a date with him? Well, it wasn't really a date, but two people sitting together drinking coffee sounded pretty muck like a date to him. And for someone who never done that with a girl before, he was tempted to take her offer. She was beautiful, after all. And seemed really nice. And she had been crying before, and maybe she really needed someone to talk to._

 _He must have taken too long too answer, because he added quietly, "unless you have something better to do."_

 _"Oh, no! I mean, I would love to go out with you! I mean, I would like to drink coffee with you… somewhere else other than here."_

 _She smiled at him and started to walk towards the exit. "Great, then let's go!"_

Barney shook himself out from the memory. He shouldn't think about her. It was doing him no good. That was ten years ago, long long into the past.

The next day he spent his time at work trying to think of knew ways to convince Ted to ditch his date and go play Laser Tag with him, but couldn't think of none. So as evening came, he put on his suit and made his way to the Laser Tag arena, trying to keep Robin out of his mind.

He focused his mind on the game, but then Ted called, and by the sound of his voice and the early hour it was, he was hoping his date wasn't good.

Ted needed his advice on something, so Barney had to take the opportunity to his advantage. "Meet me at the bar in fifteen minutes. And suit up!"

But of course Ted didn't put on a suit again. Instead he wanted to know what Barney thought about him not kissing Robin. Now that was a tricking question. Of course Barney knew the answer; yea, he should have kissed her. In every situation that was a good answer, unless a commitment was involved. But he didn't want Ted to keep meeting this girl. He was about to say exactly that, when he realized that would bee wired of him to say, and would make his friends get suspicious of him. So he had to say the obvious thing.

"You should have kissed her."

He wasn't sure how it happened, but he found himself in a cab on the way to Robin's apartment, helping Ted get the girl who could ruin his entire life. At least he got Ted to wear a suit.

Waiting in the cab was getting harder and harder for him, so he convinced Marshall and Lily to go back to the bar, where he could buy himself a scotch and forget his problems for a little while.

When Ted entered the door half an hour later and told them what happened, Barney was the happiest man alive. Leave it to Ted to screw things up. He sighed in relief for the second time in two nights, and allowed himself to relax and celebrate with his friends.

All was good and back to normal for the next few days, until one evening later what week when they all met at the bar. To Barney's surprise and dismay, Lily sat in their usual booth with no other than Robin. As soon as he saw her he panicked again, and stayed at the bar while Ted and Marshall went to talk to the two girls. He turned his back to them, buying them drinks, and trying to hide himself from her.

Luckily for him, she left after a few seconds and he could go sit with his friends. Unluckily for him, Ted wasn't ready to let her go. He had this stupid grin on his face, the one he got every time he clamed to be in love with a girl. And he was planning on having a party to win Robin's heart. Barney tried to talk him out of it, but to no luck.

So the next Friday night he dragged himself to Ted and Marshall's apartment, hoping to avoid any interaction with Robin.

Maybe he could just avoid her until Ted would get tired of chasing her, and then everything would be okay. If she didn't meet him, she would never be able to tell his friends about their little summer romance, and about his past self.

So he spent his time at the party with some hot chick who no one knew, one who couldn't know anything about him. And the next night, on the second party, he did the same (after finding out that girl was a lunatic). On the third say, though ( _how lame can Ted get? Three parties just to get that one girl?)_ he was running out of luck. That night Robin showed up. He thought he dodged the bullet when he sat her up with Carlos, but eventually he realized he couldn't run away anymore, as Ted invited her to hang out with them at the bar. 

As they made their way down the stairs he had his last chance of avoiding her, but when they entered the bar and she sat by next to him, he knew it was over. She would recognize him soon and tell his friends everything.

"Hi," she said to him as she sat down, and Barney looked up to meet her gaze. Their eyes met and he saw the now familiar blue color. "I don't think we met yet, I'm robin." She reached out her hand for him to shake.

He stared at her for a moment, trying to find it she was kidding him or not. But as the seconds flew by he realized she simply didn't recognize him, and suddenly all of his problems disappeared.

"Hey," he told her, shaking her hand. "Barney."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Barney came to accept that Robin was part of their gang now. It took him time to get used to the idea, but after a few weeks, he couldn't deny it anymore, and he knew she was there for good.

It was wired having someone around who he constantly feared would reveal his darkest secrets, but she hadn't said anything so far, so he was sure of one of two things. Either she actually didn't remember him, or she did, but decided not to talk about it and bring back old issues. And as long as she kept her mouth shut, Barney was okay with it.

Just in case he tried his best to show no sign of old Barney in front of Robin. He was as obnoxious and disgusting as he could, always talking about banging girls and ditching them. He also tried to flirt with her a bit, to confuse her and make her uncomfortable being around him so they wouldn't have to talk too much.

On one night, When Marshall and Lily went on a vacation together and Ted was finally going to sleep with his new girlfriend Victoria, Barney had no choice but to spend the evening with Robin. He was genuinely impressed when he saw her walking into the cigar bar wearing a women suit. She was looking hot and he almost couldn't resist himself. She was so different from the Robin he met ten years ago. She drank scotch and played Laser Tag with him, and offered to be his wingwoman. When she invited him to her apartment he thought that maybe, he could finally bang her after so many times he dreamed about it. But as that didn't play out according to his plan, he decided that maybe they could be friends.

And it went well, until one conversation the five of them had one night at the bar.

"So, Robin," said Marshall, who didn't know her so well just yet, "have you ever been to New York before?"

The gang learned by now that she was born and raised in Canada, but that was pretty much all they knew about her past. Well, except for Barney, but he wasn't going to say anything about that.

"Oh, yeah, um…" Robin said, a little bit uncomfortably, "I've been here before, once when I was a teenager."

"Really?" asked Lily, surprised. "You never told me. What were you doing here?"

"It was a long time ago, I don't really remember much. I was just visiting a friend." She said, and added quickly, "hey, Ted, how are things going with Victoria?"

"Wait a minute, don't change the subject," said Ted. "So you had a friend who lived in NYC?"

"Yeah, but I don't really want to talk about it."

"Why not?" asked Lily. "Did you not stay in touch?"

"Um, no…" said Robin.

"Maybe you should try and contact her, see if she wants to reconnect the friendship."

Barney decided that was his turn to join the conversation and help Robin, who was clearly feeling trapped. "And maybe we should talk about something else. So, check out this chick I banged last night," he took out his phone and showed them the picture.

"Nice!" said Ted, and the girls made a disgusted faces at him. But it worked, and they forgot all about the last topic of the conversation. As they kept talking, Robin glanced at him and smiled.

Later that night, when Ted and Marshall were talking about something and Lily went to the restroom, Robin turned to Barney.

"Thanks," she said shortly.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He answered, looking at her naively.

"For changing the subject back then, I really appreciate it."

"Oh, that. No problem."

They sat in silence for a few seconds, which gave Barney time to think about other times he sat so close to her.

 _"So, Barney, you're from New York, huh?" the blond girl asked him as they sat down at a table at Dark Horse Espresso._

 _"Yeah, Staten Island."_

 _"Nice. I've never been to New York."_

 _Barney smiled at her, "Maybe one day you will. And if you ever come, maybe we could hang out."_

 _"I would love that," she smiled back. "Tell me about your life there."_

 _Barney hesitated. He didn't really like to talk about himself. "I uh… I'm about to start my first year of college."_

 _Robin seemed impressed. "Oh, wow, so you're like, eighteen?"_

 _"Yeah, you?"_

 _"I'm sixteen."_

 _Barney really wanted to know why she had been crying before she bumped into him when they met at the mall, but he wasn't sure how to approach that subject. So instead he asked her a bunch of other questions. He learned she was born in Toronto, she had a little sister name Katie, and they were both living with their mother in Vancouver. She was there for only a few days, just like him, and she, too, wasn't in touch with her Dad. Ad it turned out, they had a lot in common._

 _He liked talking to her, she was very polite, always laughing at his stupid jokes, and smiled at him the whole time they were talking._

 _After a while he realized they were sitting there for more than two hours, and he was late to come back to the hotel._

 _"I'm sorry, but I have to go back to my mom," he told her, "and what about you? Isn't someone waiting for you?"_

 _She looked away from him, "Yeah… I guess I should go back too."_

 _He wanted to tell her how much he loved talking to her, and how he thought she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, but he couldn't let any words out._

 _"So, uh…" she said, when they paid and walked out the door. "It was really nice talking to you."_

 _"Yeah, it really was." He said back. "So, I guess this is goodbye."_

 _"Yeah." She smiled sadly at him, "goodbye, Barney."_

 _But as she started to walk away, he couldn't let that happen. For the first time in his life he met this girl who he really liked, and he couldn't just let her go. He gathered all the courage he had in him and called after her, "Hey, Robin?"_

 _She turned around and sent him a hopeful glance. "Yes, Barney?"_

 _"Would you like to meet again tomorrow?"_

 _Her face broke into a big smile. "Yeah, yeah I really would. How 'bout the beach?"_

 _"Yeah, that would be great," he said happily, "see you tomorrow."_

"Wanna know something funny?" Robin's voice brought him back to the present.

"Huh?" he asked.

Robin hesitated for a minute, but then said quietly, "his name was Barney."

He froze for a second, just staring at her. _What did she just say?_

"My friend from New York, his name was Barney. Funny, right? How many people you know with the name Barney?"

Barney laughed nervously. "Yeah, what are the odds?" he avoided her gaze and hoped she didn't notice his discomfort.

"But it was a long time ago, and he was nothing like you."

And luckily for him, the others got back to the booth just then, and saved him from answering her.

Of course that Barney was nothing like him, he thought. He changed. He became awesome, lost the hippie clothes in favor of his awesome suits, stopped believing in love and relationships, and by that stopped his heart from breaking again.

And he was right to do that, because if he still believed in that crap, his heart would have brake after Robin didn't recognize him, and called him _just a friend._

But still he couldn't deny that the fact that he seemed to mean nothing to her, did sting a little.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I just watched Dr Horrible's sing along blog (for the million time) and I just had to add something about it, because it was just genius! NPH is awesome

Chapter 3

Barney avoided Robin for the next few days. He still hadn't got over her not remembering him, so he tried to take some time to digest it all. He avoided the bar for four nights in a row, and he knew his friends started to notice. He got two phone calls from Lily and three from Ted on the fifth.

"Fine, I'll come to the bar tonight," he promised Lily, after she called him again from an unregistered number.

"Good," she sounded satisfied. "Don't even think of bailing. I'll hunt you down."

He regretted ever giving her his home address.

So that night he had no other choice but to get himself out of his apartment and take a cab to MacLarns'.

When he arrived at the bar only Ted, his girlfriend Victoria and Robin were there, sitting at their usual booth. He sat in the regular single chair, avoiding eye contact with Robin, and greeted them with his usual arrogant grin which he had practiced at home.

"Hey, guys, what up?"

"Oh, hey Barney!" said Ted, "Where have you been, man? You missed some awesome nights!"

Barney chuckled, "Huh, like you could have an awesome night without me."

They all ignored him.

"Okay, guys, I wanted to wait for everyone to show you this, but now that Barney's here, I just can't wait anymore!" Robin said excitedly, taking out her phone. "You won't believe what I've found on Youtube! It's just hilarious!"

"What is it?" asked Victoria, exited as well.

"You know how we saw Marshall's doppelganger the other day?"

Ted turned to his girlfriend, "I should explain. We saw an ad on a bus with a photo of a guy who looked exactly like Marshall, only with a mustache."

"Nice," Victoria giggled.

"So, anyway, I-"

"Hey, guys!" Lily and Marshall greeted them as they just arrived at the table. Marshall pulled another chair to sit next to Barney, and Lily sat beside Robin in the booth. "Barney, where have you been?"

"I-" Barney started to say, but Robin cut in.

"Wait, let me tell this one first!" she giggled to herself. "I found Barney's doppelganger!"

"What?!" everyone turned to look at her.

"You found my doppelganger?" that was the first time he spoke to her directly since the other night. Finding his doppelganger was really exiting and made him forget about his anger towards her.

"Yes! This is just so ironic, you won't believe it," she turned on her phone and showed them the video. It was a video blog of a blonde guy in a white robe who wore weird goggles on his head, and called himself Dr Horrible. He looked exactly like Barney.

"Oh my god, this is so cool!" Barney laughed, "My doppelganger is a supervillian, who has a blog! Try to beat that one!"

Lily looked skeptically at the screen, "Are we sure this isn't just Barney in a weird costume, trying one of his plays to sleep with someone?"

"As great idea as that might be, it's not me, I swear!"

"I donno," said Ted, "could be you, the blog thing works pretty fine, and I sometimes wonder about the amount of evil running down your veins."

"Ha ha," Barney said sarcastically.

"Nah, that could not be Barney," Robin said, still laughing, "the guy's singing about love."

"Right," said Ted, while the others joined her laughter.

"Whatever, he looks awesome. Can you send it to me? I want to watch it all!" Barney asked Robin.

"Sure, what your Email address?" Barney gave it to her, and she started typing on her phone.

The rest moved on to talking about the big test Marshall had to take for his Law studies, but Barney couldn't concentrate. Something about Robin's comment bugged him. She thought he wasn't capable of feeling love. That wasn't weird of her to think, he never gave her or anyone else a reason to believe otherwise. He did all he could to be this distant and unemotional guy, but it was still just a pretence. He would do everything to never give anyone another chance to break his heart. Two times were more than enough.

Suddenly he felt Robin's eyes on him, staring at him fiercely.

"That's weird," she said.

"What?" he asked.

She ripped her gaze from him and turned to her phone again.

"It says here that I sent you an email once."

Barney's eyes winded.

 _Crap._

"O-oh?

"Really?" asked Ted, confused, "Why would you send him mail?"

Robin's eyes were back on Barney, and his heart pounded fast in his chest. That was it, Robin finally realized it was him and she would tell the others everything. But after a few seconds, who felt like hours to Barney, she just turned of her phone and shrugged.

"Must be some sort of mistake."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It was three hours later that Robin found herself sitting on the couch in her living room, staring at her laptop. It showed her Email, open on one particular mail.

 _Hey, Robin._

 _I don't understand. We had such a great time that one week four months ago, and when you came to New York. You said you had fun and that I make you laugh… I just don't understand. Did I do something wrong? Please answer me, you've been avoiding my emails for a few days now and I'm starting to worry something might have happened to you._

 _Please just tell me what's wrong._

 _I miss you,_

 _Barney._

She scrolled down the screen and saw her last reply to that Email; _I'm sorry. Please stop contact me. It's over._

Sixteen years old her was pretty harsh. She didn't think she would ever see him again, but apparently she'd been meeting him almost everyday, without even realizing it.

She had hard time to grasp the fact that Barney from the bar and her Barney were the same person. They had two different personalities. Her Barney (she can't believe she just referred to him as _her_ Barney) was sweet, kind and naïve. But the Barney she spent drinking scotch and playing Laser Tag with these past few months was completely different. He was colder, always calculated, smug and sarcastic. He lured innocent girls into his bed and then abandoned them.

She couldn't help herself from wondering if she had a part in making him that way. She put the laptop down on the table and let her mind drift to memories she buried from the past.

 _Robin sat in a very uncomfortable chair in a plane to New York. She couldn't believe she was doing this. She was actually going to visit New York, a city she only heard about, but wanted to visit all her life. Sure, she was only sixteen so that wasn't that long, but still._

 _She knew her mother would never let her do that, fly alone to a different country, but she couldn't resist herself. So she bought the ticket in secret with the money she made from her last concert as Robin Sparkles, and told her mother a lie about going to spend Christmas with her father. She knew her parents didn't speak to one another and there was a very small chance her mother would find out._

 _She was really exited. She was going to spend the holiday in Staten Island with Barney's family. And she was going to see him again, after four months of exchanged emails._

 _She still remembered the time they spent together at Toronto in the summer. On the day she met him she had a point of break down; she couldn't take all of the stress from the concert and her agent's high expectations. Then this American boy came out of nowhere and offered to talk to her, and he acted so normal and didn't recognize her, which was a nice change. After that day they met each other everyday of his vacation, mostly spending their time at the beach._

 _She still remembered his blue eyes and his sad smile on his face when they hugged goodbye at the airport, when he and his mom had to get back to NY. She still remembered the taste of his lips on hers._

 _"I'm really happy I met you," he told her then, "and I really want us to keep in touch."_

 _"Me too," she smiled at him. "We'll write every day!"_

 _Robin couldn't wait to see him again._

 _Half an hour later she exited the plane, stepping her foot out of Canada for the first time. She found her luggage easily and walked outside of the airport, searching for Barney and his mom. It was snowing outside, and while she was used to it, she tighten her jeans coat around her._

 _Suddenly she heard her name being called, and turned around to see Barney standing in front of her, with his hippy sweater on and a big smile on his face._

 _"Robin, you made it!" he came closer, and after a second of hesitation pulled her closer for a hug. His body warmed her instantly, and she wrapped her arms around him. She had missed him._

 _"Hey," she smiled at him when they drew apart._

 _"Hi." He smiled back. "Here, let me take that," he took hold of her suitcase._

 _"Where's your mom?" she asked him, looking around._

 _"Oh," Barney grinned, "she couldn't come, something at work came up, so I said I could come and get you by myself."_

 _She was very glad for that. It meant some time for them to be alone together. And she wanted time with him for quite some time._

 _"Come on, let's go find a cab."_

Robin couldn't believe it had been ten years ago. Now that she had that memory in the front of her mind, she could actually feel the warmth of his arms around her. She was still shocked it was Barney.

She was really surprised it was him, and that she couldn't figure it out for herself, because he did look like himself. Except for the suits, of course. Oh, and his short blonde hair, the cocky grin he always worn and the coldness of his eyes. Okay, so maybe it wasn't that hard to believe that she didn't recognize him.

She knew he recognized her. The way his eyes winded when she commented on the Email gave it away immediately. She wondered when he had figured it out, and why wasn't he talking to her about it, and acting as if they only knew each other for a few months.

When she tried to ask him about that Email after the rest of the gang had left the bar for the night, he acted as if he didn't know what she was talking about and hurried to walk out of the bar and into a cab. She didn't know why he was acting that way, but she was going to find out.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N : idiotpurple **,** I was tempted to use your idea to make Robin the new Shannon, but eventually decided against it. But it was an interesting idea. Thanks for the reviews, it's nice to know at least one person is reading my story.

I'm not really sure I'm happy about how this chapter turned out, what do you think?

Chapter 5

When Robin entered Ted's and Marshall's apartment Barney was already there, sitting on the couch with a beer in hand. He turned his head to look at her, but the second their eyes met he averted his gaze.

He hadn't talk to her since last night, even though she'd tried to call him several times to talk about her discovery. She decided that tonight she won't let him get away from her. She needed to know why he didn't talk to her. She knew she had hurt him in the past, but he seemed to be fine around her before. She thought they became friends. But maybe she was wrong. Maybe he was just nice to her because his friends seemed to like her and he just tolerated her presence.

After hugging Lily and saying hello to Marshall she took a beer and sat on the other side of the couch. She wanted to talk to him, but she knew now was not the time, they needed to do this when they could be alone.

Ted and Victoria arrived a few minutes later, and Marshall took out what looked like a board game.

"It's called Marshgammon," he told them proudly.

They started playing, when suddenly Lily seemed to remember something, and turned her attention to Barney.

"Oh, Barney, by the way, I went to a party in the new building on 82 and the host said she knew you."

 _Must be another girl Barney slept with,_ Robin thought to herself.

"What was her name… Sharon, Shannon-"

"Shannon?!"

Robin, and the rest of the gang, turned to look at Barney surprisingly. What happened to him? He seemed as if he saw a ghost.

But he recovered immediately, turning back to himself, "Shannon, Shannon… no, don't remember any Shannon."

"Really," said Lily. "'Cause she gave me a video tape to-"

"WHERE'S THE TAPE?!"

Everybody stared at him again, shocked. They had never seemed Barney so stressed. He looked back at Lily with fear in his eyes.

"I'll get it." Said Lily and went to get the tape.

Robin stared at Barney. She didn't know what to make of his odd behavior. Who was this Shannon that made him act this way?

Lily came back and after Barney's attempt to destroy the tape she took out the real one and put it in the VCR.

What they saw on the screen was a complete shock to everyone. Young Barney (though older than Robin remembered him), in a hippy shirt and his long hair stood behind an organ and cried his heart out for the camera.

"Shannon, I love you! I love you so much!"

All Robin could do was stare at the TV in amazement. This was the first time she had ever seen Barney cry. _Did he cry like that for me too?_

"What about us changing the world together? Don't tell me you've forgotten! I know I haven't…"

And then he began to sing. She glanced at the real Barney, who had his gaze fixed on the screen, and she could swear she saw a single tear slipping down his cheek.

He stood up then, snatched the tape and stormed out of the room, leaving everyone staring at the door.

"Wow. That was… weird," said Ted after a minute of silence.

"Yeah…" Marshall agreed.

"I feel kinda bad," said Lily, shamefully, "we should find him and make sure he's okay."

"I'll go after him," Robin volunteered. The rest of the gang turned to look at her. "I think I know where to find him. I'll see you at the bar later," she stood up, took her bag and coat and left.

She needed to talk to him, fast. She needed to know what was the tape all about, and to finally get answers from him about why he was avoiding her. She didn't really know where he could have gone to, but she had to find him.

She checked the bar first, but there was no sign of him. Then she searched the cigar bar, the Lager Tag place, even the strip club he always went to. But he was no where to be found. So after an hour of searching she decided to check the last place on her list; his apartment.

She knew the address from Lily, so she took a cab and half an hour later she stood in front of his door. She was pretty nervous about what she would find inside. She hoped he was home, and she nervously knocked on the door.

A few minutes passed with no answer, and she was about to turn around and leave when suddenly the door opened up, and revealed Barney behind it. He wore a white unbuttoned shirt and had a glass of scotch in his hand. His hair was messy, his eyes were somehow hunted, but he had his annoying grin on.

"Hey, _Robin_ ," his voice sounded dripping with sarcasm to her.

"Barney," she said and turned back to look at him. "Can… can I come in?"

"Oh, sure," he said, stumbling back and gesturing his hand for her to come in. He seemed to be pretty drunk. "What brings you here on this lovely evening?"

"Barney, I-" she tried to say but the words stuck in her throat. She just stood in the middle of his leaving room and stared at him.

Barney drank the rest of his drink, then went behind his counter and poured more into his glass. "Yeah?" he said, raising his gaze to look at her.

Robin didn't know what to say, and his eyes on her made her nervous, so she avoided his gaze and looked around at his apartment. The first thing she noticed was that everything seemed to be grey; the couch, the walls, the giant TV. Then she noticed the stormtrooper in the corner, the sword behind the couch, and a pack of cards lying innocently on the table in front of her. This apartment was so Barney.

She turned her eyes to look at him and saw him drinking straight from the bottle. "I think you had enough to drink for one night, don't you think?"

Barney made a weird sound, almost like a chuckle, bringing the liquor to his lips again, "there is never enough with me." He laughed. "So," he said, looking at her again, "you finally figured it out, huh?"

"Um, yeah…" she mumbled nervously. Would he be mad at her for not realizing it sooner?

"Took you long enough."

"Barney, I'm so-" she tried to say, but he stopped her.

"Don't. Whatever. It's not like I thought I meant something to you."

"No, Barney, that's not true. Look, I really am so-" She tried to say again, but he didn't listen to her.

"I nailed her, you know?" he laughed, and smiled like he was pleased with himself. When she didn't say anything he added, "Shannon."

"Oh." She simply said. She still had no idea who Shannon was.

"She was my… well, you could say girlfriend, but you and I don't like that word too much, do we?"

Robin thought it was best to just let him keep talking.

"She cheated on me. With a man in a freaking suit. After she made me wait three whole years to sleep with her." His left hand, the one who didn't hold the bottle, turned into a fist.

"So I finally nailed her tonight."

"Is that why you tried to sleep with me, too?" she couldn't help herself but asking.

Barney's eyes shot up to meet hers. He paused for a long moment and then the edges of his lips turned up. "Yes."

It felt like a punch to the heart. She knew he didn't love her, but it still hurt to hear that he only wanted sex. She actually thought he was different from the rest of the guys she used to date, that he was nice and kind and caring. And then suddenly the whole image she had of past Barney just shattered in front of her eyes.

Or maybe he was really like that, but his heart being broken by two girls in a row made him change his whole being. Maybe he was just too scared to get hurt again. Maybe she did break his heart when she broke up with him all those years ago.

 _"I hate it that you have to leave," Barney told her, when they stepped out of the cab at the airport. It was the end of her short trip in New York. She had to get back to Canada to keep with her tour as Robin Sparkles. She never got to tell him about her being a popstar in Canada. He acted as if she was just a normal teenager, and it was so nice to have someone treating her that way instead of all the fans she had back home, who just befriended her because she was famous._

 _"Me too," she said._

 _Barney took her hand in his, leading her inside. He helped her through the check in desk, lifting her suitcase and getting her flying ticket, and then it was time to say goodbye._

 _"When will I see you again?"_

 _"I don't know," she told him, wanting to promise him they would meet soon, but she knew that would be a lie. She wouldn't have time to come to New York again, with all her concerts, and she knew he had a hard time in his new school. He told her how they almost kicked him out because he nearly got the whole school on fire._

 _He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his hands around her waist, and whispered in her hear, "I'm going to miss you so much." And then his lips met her, and she felt like she could fly. He wasn't her first kiss, but he defiantly kissed better than her last one (which turned out to be gay)._

 _"Bye, Barney."_

Yes, she broke up with him, but it wasn't because she wanted to. It was just so hard to find time to talk to him when she had to move from one city to another and perform with her annoying song all the time. And when her manager found out she had a boyfriend he told her parents, and her father called her and yelled at her for two hours. It was just too much for her, and she couldn't take it anymore. So she ended it with Barney, and for the rest of that year there wasn't a day went by without regrets.

She knew she owed him an apology, even if he insisted to not let her speak.

"Listen, Barney," she said to the now even more drunk blonde, "I'm truly sorry I broke up with you and that I-"

"Woah, woah, woah," he chuckled again. She really hated when he did that. " _Broke up_ with me? You think we were in a relationship? Come on Robin, you know me for how long now? I don't do relationships. I may have been lame in the past, but I was still Barney Stinson. I don't do relationships. You may think you know me, but clearly you don't."

"I think you're drunk, Barney," she said, trying to repress the hurt from her voice, "I came here to apologize, but apparently you don't need my apology, so maybe I should just go."

"Fine, go."

"Bye, Barney," she turned up and left, missing the first tears sliding down his face.

The next day at the bar Barney told them the whole story of Shannon. How they dated for three years when he was in collage, how she wanted to wait until marriage, how they planed to join the peace core together and finally how she cheated on him with a guy in a suit.

During the whole story Robin stayed silent. She kept thinking about the night before. The stuff he said to her really hurt her, even though she didn't expect much. It was Barney, after all, and he avoided her before and didn't want to talk about their past. She knew it was going to be difficult, she just didn't know he would be that harsh.

When he finish his story, and the gang all turned to talk about something else, he glanced at her and after a moment of hesitation asked her quietly, "Hey, Robin, can you come to the bar with me for a second?"

She didn't feel like talking to him after what he said to her last night, but she was curious for what he had to say, so she nodded and followed him out of the booth.

"Listen, I know you know. I tried to avoid it because… well, you know how lame I was back then, and I didn't want them to know. I was scared that you would tell them and… you know. Whatever. Anyway, now that the already know, I guess it's no use to avoid it anymore. So, ah… we're cool, right?"

All Robin could do was stare. Was he for real? What about all the staff he said last night?

"Um, Robin?" he said after an awkward silence from her side. "You know what I'm talking about, right? Us knowing each other in the past, the whole… summer in Canada thing, meeting at the mall and all that?"

Did he not remember what he said to her less than 24 hours ago?

"Um, yeah…" she mumbled. "Barney, what did you do last night?"

"What?" he looked at her confusedly. "What do you mean? I already told you, I nailed Shannon."

"And then?" she needed to be sure he really didn't remember.

"Then I got back home and went to sleep. I think I may have drunk most of my scotch supply. Anyway, why?"

"Um, nevermind."

"Oh, okay. So, _are_ we okay? I mean, we're friends, right?"

Robin looked at him, and he smiled at her with uncertainty in his eyes, and the answer came out before she could stop herself.

"Yeah, sure. Friends."

"Great," he sighed in relief. "I was scared for a moment there you were upset I didn't tell you right away, but now that I know we're okay, how 'bout I'll be your wingman for tonight?"

And suddenly everything turned back to normal. He was her friend again. And she didn't know what to think or how she felt about this. But he was her friend again, and for now that was okay.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Life continued, and with each day that passed Robin fulfilled a bigger part in their gang, until one day, Barney couldn't remember a time while she wasn't there. She knew all their stories, all their private jokes. (She even started to develop her own with Ted. Oh, how he hated that joke.)

He was glad that there wasn't any awkwardness left between them, and after everyone saw the tape he'd made Shannon, there was no point in denying his past. They all seemed okay with it, and Barney felt relived. He always feared his friends kept him in the gang because he was so awesome and he thought if they saw the other side of him they wouldn't stay his friends. But they proved him wrong, and it only brought them closer. Not that Barney showed that side of him more often now. He was still Barney Stinson.

He decided not to tell them about his past romance with Robin, though, and she didn't mention it either. The only time they spoke about it was the night after Game Night. She said they were okay, that they were friends, and that was all he needed to hear.

There was no point talking about it more, what was in the past stayed in the past, and there was no point to bring all his feelings towards her back to the surface. He still felt hurt by her choice to cut him out of her life after all the amazing time they spent together and the long conversations they had back then. She knew so much about him, and it was hard acting normal around her. But she didn't talk to him about it, and even though there was nothing he wanted more than to know the reason behind her actions, he thought it was best to just let it be and leave the subject untouched. At least for now.

That was until the events that took place four weeks after the tape incident. They were all sitting at their usual booth in MacLarens', drinking and laughing.

"-and so the only way for us to see them is to go to this school prom! So I'm sorry, Ted, but me and Marshall can't come," Lily answered Ted. She and Marshall were in the middle of planning their wedding, and were really busy those days.

"How about you, Barney?" asked Ted, turning to Barney, his eyes widening in a stupid way.

"Yeah, like that face is going to work on me," Barney chucked. "Sorry, bro, I think I'll pass."

"Oh, come on, man! I need your help! I don't know what to send her!"

Ted and Victoria were trying to keep their relationship alive by sending each other packages full with gifts, after she decided to move to Germany. So far she'd sent him three boxes full of cupcakes, and he had sent her none.

"And you want Barney to help you with that? Are you sure, Ted? _Barney_ , getting a gift for a woman? Don't think that's a good idea…"

Ted seemed to consider it for a second. "Yeah, good point."

"Hey! Well, yeah, that's true."

"Well, what about you, Robin?" Ted asked the Canadian, who was uncharacteristically quiet during the whole conversation. "Can you come to the mall with me tomorrow to help me find her a nice gift?"

"I, um… no, I can't… I um…I… um… I can't, because I… have that… thing… yeah, I have this thing. So no, I can't. Sorry."

"Robin, are you okay?" Lily asked worriedly while Robin gulped the rest of her drink in one go.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be? I'm fine. Totally fine."

"Are you sure?" asked Barney.

"What thing?" pressed Ted.

"Just this… thing. At work."

Ted narrowed his eyes. "You're lying."

"What? No."

"Yes, you are!"

"Am not!"

"Why won't you go to the mall with me?!"

"Guys, stop shouting, people are starting to-"

"I just can't, Ted, leave me alone!"

"Not until you tell me why!"

"Fine! I don't go to malls!"

There was s moment of pure silence at the table, and then they all said at once, "What?"

"I-don't-go-to-malls." Robin said again, emphasizing each word. "There, I said it, happy now?"

"What do you mean you don't go to malls?" asked Lily. "Why?"

"I just don't."

"Yes, you do." As soon as Barney said it he knew he shouldn't have, but the damage was done. Robin's eyes shot up immediately to meet his, and the look in them was of pure anger, challenging him to keep talking.

"Don't you remember that _one time_ you and I were at the mall, together?"

"No, I don't." she said, narrowing her eyes, who was still fixed on his. Then she averted her gaze, faked a yawn and got up. "I think I'll call it a night, it's getting pretty late and I have this thing tomorrow. So, see you later guys."

She left the booth with no other word.

Barney excused himself and hurried to follow her out of the bar. He caught her just before she was about to get into a cab.

"Robin, wait!" he called after her, getting a hold on her right hand. She turned around angrily and jerked her hand away from his grip.

"What?" her voice was harsh.

"What just happened over there?" he asked, concerned. He didn't understand her odd behavior.

"What happened is that you just crossed the line, Barney! I know we didn't talk about it, but I thought it was pretty clear to both of us that we're not going to talk about the past!"

"I-" he tried to say but she didn't left him finish. She got inside the cab and slammed the door in his face. Before he could do or say anything the cab drove away, leaving Barney standing there, confused as hell.

He returned back to the gang, which all turned to look at him expectedly.

"Well?" asked Ted. "What's her problem?"

Barney just shrugged.

"You think it's true?" when they all looked at her confused, Lily added, "the whole not going to malls thing."

"I don't know," said Marshall. "Maybe something happened to her once at a mall, and she is traumatized?"

"What could happen to someone at a mall? She forgot her purse on sale season?"

"Probably something more serious than that. Hey, I know! What if she got married at the mall?" suggested Marshall.

"Married?" Ted laughed at that. "No way. It's Robin we're talking about."

"It could be," Marshall insisted. "Think about it, every time Robin mentioned a wedding she always talked about a friend of her from Canada who got married _way too young_." He quoted Robin's words, "Maybe that friend is actually her."

"No, no way. Robin doesn't believe in marriage and doesn't want to ever get married."

"Yeah, Ted, because she already is."

"Back me up here, Barney," said Ted.

Barney just stared ahead, his face blank. Could it be true? Could Robin be married? He knew for a fact that she did go to malls. They have met _at_ a mall. So whatever happened to her at a mall must have happened after that day. Or maybe…

 _"Oh, I'm so sorry," said a feminine voice behind him, with thick Canadian accent._

 _"It's alright," he said, and turned around to look at the person who bumped into him. She seemed around his age, maybe a little bit younger. She had long blond curly hair, with a red band tied up in it. She wore a jeans jacket, and a cute little skirt. When he looked at her blue eyes he saw she had been crying. "Are you okay?" he asked, trying to be nice._

 _"Oh, yeah, of course," she said, whipping a few tears from her cheeks. "Just fine._ "

Robin had been crying on the day they had first met. He never got to find out why. She had been crying, and it was at a mall. So maybe something did happen to her at a mall. He doubted it was getting married. She was only sixteen, and she wasn't wearing a white dress. Heck, she asked him out that day. There was no way it was a marriage thing. Although, her being married to someone would explain why she broke things off with him.

"No, sorry dude," he told Marshall. "Not married."

"I'm telling you guys, it has to be it!"

"Nope."

"Wanna bet?"

Barney's eyes lit up. It was a well known fact he had a little problem decaling bets.

"Hundred thousand dollars?"

"I don't have a hundred thousand dollars," replied his bigger friend.

"Fine then, slap bet?"

"Slap bet!"


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

He stared at the closed door in front of him, not sure what to do. He hesitated for a few more seconds and then gathered his courage and knocked.

"Who is it?" he heard her soft voice from the other side, and felt relived she was there.

He wasn't sure what her reaction would be, and after the way she yelled at him outside the bar, he wasn't sure she would want to see him, but he had to try.

"It's me… Barney."

A few minutes passed with no response, but then he heard a sound of a key twisting in a lock, and a second later she opened the door. She wore a long blue robe, holding a glass of wine in her hand.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her tone softer than he expected.

"I came to apologize," he admitted, trying to smile reassuringly at her, "for what I said at the bar earlier. You were right, it was out of line and so I'm sorry." He wasn't a man of apologies, but somehow with her it was different. With her he was different, but he wasn't sure yet why.

Robin stared at him for a long moment, searching his face for any sigh of joke. When she found none, she stepped back and gestured her free hand at the living room. "Do you want to come in?"

"Are you sure?" he hesitated. He wasn't sure if that was the best idea, even though he really wanted to. He knew what stepping into a tipsy girl's apartment in the middle of the night could mean. He lived that scenario so many times. But this was Robin, and she was still his friend.

"Yeah, sure, why not?"

"Okay." He followed her into the room, closing the door behind him.

"Want a drink?" she asked him, walking to the kitchen and pouring a second glass for him. She came back to the living room, where he still stood with his hands in his pockets, and handed him the drink.

He thanked her awkwardly, suddenly losing all his courage. Now alone with her again, he felt as the insecure kid he used to be when he first met her.

She smiled and sat at the couch, gesturing him to do the same. He hesitated for only a second before sitting down beside her.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," she said quietly, surprising him. "It's just… I don't want them to find out either."

"I understand perfectly." He told her. She had her own secrets, just like he did. He suddenly felt really stupid for trying to push her to tell him at the bar.

"Can I ask you something, Barney?" she asked, and he could hear hesitation in her voice.

"Of course. We're friends, you can ask me anything." It was just with her that he allowed himself to be so vulnerable. She did know that side of him, after all.

"Did I ever mean something to you?"

"What?" he asked surprised.

"What we had back then, ten years ago… did it mean anything to you?"

He tried to look at her, but she avoided his eyes, so he stared at the glass in his hand instead. He wanted to tell her that, yes, _of course_ it meant something to him. It meant everything to him. She was the first and only girl he actually had feeling for. Shannon was great (at first) but she wasn't Robin. The only reason he started dating Shannon in the first place was because she reminded him of Robin with her blonde hair and idealistic ideas.

But when he opened his mouth to speak, he couldn't say anything. He was too scared of her reaction. He knew she wasn't a fan of feelings (after what Ted had done on their first and only date, who could blame her?) and she was the one who broke things off with him. So why was she asking him that? Why now? What was she expecting him to say?

He couldn't admit his past feelings for her, if it wasn't the same for her too. He reminded of his promise to himself to never get his true feelings out there for a girl to crash and burn again.

But it was Robin, and she was sitting there, so close to him, her fingers clenching into a fist beside his leg. She was breathing hard, avoiding his gaze and waiting nervously for his respond.

"Yes," he whispered eventually, and wanted to kick himself for admitting that. But now that it was out there, he felt kind of relived.

"Oh," was all she said, and she still kept her eyes away from him. She slowly took a sip from her wine, her other hand still in a strong fist.

"Robin? Please look at me," he asked, hoping she would finally look at him. When she didn't, he put one finger under her chin, raising her face up so their eyes finally met.

She had this sad look on her face, like she was torn. A single tear was forming in the corner of her right eye.

"Hey, it's okay," he reassured her, whipping the tear away. "Look, it's okay that you didn't feel the same. I got over it. Really, it's okay. It's all in the past. The important thing is that we met again and we're friends now, okay?"

She closed her eyes, and he was scared he might have said the wrong thing, when suddenly she got up and entered her bedroom, leaving him alone on the couch.

He felt like crying himself. He just did it again, opening up to a girl only to get turned down. Why did he never learn? Why did he keep making that mistake over and over again?

Everything was so great, they were finally friends and he really liked that. She understood him better than anyone, and he really liked to hang out with her these past few months. And now he had to say that and ruin everything.

He was about to get up and leave, when she suddenly came back, holding a black tape in her hands. She looked at him nervously, and took a deep breath before speaking.

"Barney, there is something you need to know," she said, her hands shaking a little while she handed him the tape.

"What is that?" he asked, taking it from her. It had a white label on, which said _Robin Sparkles._

"Sparkles?" he laughed, but when he saw the serious glare Robin sent him he shut up.

"This is my secret," she told him. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this, I just… needed to keep it to myself for a while. But I think it's time you knew."

"Is this porn?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at her. He knew it wasn't but couldn't resist from asking.

"No," she said, and laughed a little. "I wish it was."

"Me too," he winked at her, feeling his confident getting back to him, and she laughed again.

"Put it in," she said, and when he winked again, she punched his shoulder. He chuckled, suddenly feeling a lot lighter, and put the tape in the VCR.

"Just don't laugh at me."

"I promise," he said as the screen came to life, and he saw young Robin, just as he remembered her, in a school uniform, talking seductively to a grown man.

"It is porn!" he turned to look at her, shock written all over his face.

Robin shook her head, "just keep watching."

He turned his attention back on the screen, when suddenly young Robin started to sing. Barney stared, his eyes wide, for the whole song. When it was over, he still had his eyes stuck on the screen, which now turned blue.

"What the hell was that?" he asked, unbelievingly. "You were-"

"A Canadian teen pop star? yeah." She finished for him.

He turned to look at her, still shocked.

"Wow," was all he managed to say. "That was…"

"Embarrassing? The most stupid thing you even seen?"

"Awesome! God, Scherbatsky, or should I say Sparkles, you are just awesome!"

"Really?" she asked skeptically, "you don't think it's stupid?"

"Stupid?! What are you talking about? That was super hot! Can we watch it again?"

"Wait," she said, holding him back before he could get up to replay it. "I think we should talk about a few things before."

Barney nodded. He did have so many questions, now that he knew that she used to be a pop star. "Okay, so you were a teen pop star. How did that happen?"

"You know about my fight with my father, when I was fifteen. I moved to live with my mom, dyed my hair blonde and started to be more… girly."

Barney nodded again, he knew all that from when they used to sent emails to each other.

"So I met new friends, who worked at the music industry and they convinces me to audition… and I got in. I recorded that song when I was sixteen, and then I had a year of touring all over Canada, singing it at malls." She hesitated for a minute, and then added, "My first concert was the day we met."

Barney stared at her, his mouth gaping open. "You were crying that day," he told her, as if she didn't know.

"Yeah, I was just starting to get used to the whole being famous thing, it was pretty overwhelming. And you… you didn't recognize me, when I bumped into you. You didn't know who I was, and it was a huge relief to be around someone who treated me as just another normal human being."

They both stayed quiet for a while, just thinking things through. Barney was confused, but also a little relived to finally know the truth. He couldn't believe there was so much he still didn't know about Robin, while she knew so much about him. Back then, he had told her everything, about his family, his mom and brother, about how he didn't know who his dad was. He had told her about the way he always wanted to be more accepted by his the kids in his old school, and how he barley had any friends. And here he is, figuring out she had this whole life he didn't even know about.

It was pretty cool, though. He couldn't deny his attraction to her, who now grew even stronger, after watching her younger self on screen, cheery and naïve as he remembered her.

He still had questions for her, especially one that always bothered him. "Is that why you stopped talking to me?"

Robin met his gaze and let go a sigh she was holding. "Sort of, my manager found out about us chatting, and he got pretty mad. He told my parents, and my dad called me that day. He also found out that I visited you in Christmas. He yelled at me for nearly two whole hours."

"I'm sorry," he told her, putting one hand on her shoulder for comfort. "I wish you would have told me."

"I know, I'm sorry too," she said. "I wanted to talk to you about it, but then when the year was over I thought you probably were over it and that you moved on. And I was right, you had Shannon."

Barney flinched. The last person he wanted to talk about was Shannon. He hated that bitch.

"I didn't really care about her, just so you know."

"Oh I know," she said, smiling bitterly. "You told me so."

"What? What do you mean?"

"The night we saw your tape."

"No I haven't," he said, remembering that night. He and Robin didn't talk at all that night, because he was afraid of her telling everyone about his past. "I avoided you that night."

"Oh, you avoided me alright," she accused, but then added, "but not when I came to your apartment."

"You what?" he said, surprised.

"I came looking for you after you ran out of Ted's apartment. I wanted to apologize, for… well, for the way things ended between us in the past."

"Really? I can't remember such a thing."

"Yeah, you were drunk as hell. You told me you slept with Shannon, and you seemed pretty proud at that." She hesitated for just a second before saying, "when I asked you if that was the reason you tried to be with me, you said yes. That you only wanted to get into my pants."

He stared at her, shocked. He didn't remember any of it. Could he really have said that?

"I- I'm sorry, Robin." He told her honestly. "I don't remember saying such a thing, but it's not true."

"Isn't it?"

"No! You… you meant more than that to me." He admitted again, forgetting his promise and the fact that she hadn't said that back. "The night we spent together a while ago, when you came to laser tag and the cigar bar with me, I really started to like you. The new you. I mean, past you were great, but now… Robin, now you are even more awesome than when we first met."

She smiled at him. "Really?"

"Yes, really. I don't know why I said otherwise that night, but I guess I was just- hurt."

"Well, I tried to apologize that night, but you didn't let me. So let me try again. I'm sorry," she said, and he smiled at her.

"It's okay. I'm just really glad we're friends now. For real this time."

"Me too."

"So, can we watch the video again?" he asked eagerly.

"Yeah, sure." She clicked play on the remote, and they both watched the television in silence, listening to Let's Go To The Mall.

"Hey, Barney?" she suddenly asked.

"Hmm?"

"Please don't tell the rest about it."

Barney turned to look at her. "I won't. But you should know, Marshall think you're married at a mall."

"What?" she laughed. "That's ridiculous."

"I know, you, married? Yeah, right."

"Hey, let's mess with them a little," she suggested. He grinned evilly at her.

"See, Scherbatsky? That's why I like you."


End file.
